I am absolutely blown away by your latest album Real Life!

Jerry

…there is a common thread of your life story moving throughout each song

Tony

Your CD is amazing! … The sound is terrific, the instrumentation sounds top-notch.  Listening to it requires more than listening; it requires thought and even a little meditation, as the words are so engaging …Thanks for letting me and the rest of the world in like that.

Lynn

Your way of singing your thoughts, sometimes just listing them, is an unmistakable signature.

Bob

This record is incredible! 

Ryan

Songs: Lee (all written in 2020)
“Life is Unreal”: Ahren & Lee
Arrangements: Lee & Ahren
Recording: Mount Vesuvius Studios
Musicians:
Lee Chapman: Vocals, Guitar
Ahren Buchheister: (many)
Nick Bertling: Drums
Noah Bein: Organ
Seth Kibel: Flute, Clarinet, Tenor Sax
Josh Lilly: Piano
Frank Russo: Drums
Robert Green: Hurdy-Gurdy
Mike Noonan: Trombone

Stream the full album here

or selected songs with commentary and lyrics below:

Unreal Life – Lee Chapman – Full Album

Tell Me I’m Sexy (2020) :
The spoken introduction explains where the idea came from. I’m not sure that’s a good idea, but the song already had a long, weird instrumental introduction and I thought it might be a bit more palatable if there were some words going on at the same time.

This is another one of those songs where people will assume it’s me talking about me. Even I thought that just now when I was listening to it. But it’s not me, it’s a character: a clueless straight guy who insults women. Of course people will listen to this and think I’m insulting women. No, this is me making fun of a clueless guy who insults women.

Ahren Buchheister: Bass Guitar
Nick Bertling: Drums
Noah Bein: Organ

lyrics

Stuck (2021)
I’ve been writing a lot of songs lately, and I worry that I might just be writing the same song over and over even though it doesn’t seem to be the case. But I do find myself falling into certain clichés and I worry that I’m stuck in a musical rut.

It can’t be a coincidence that I wrote this during the Covid pandemic, when we can’t travel and can’t shop and can’t eat out and can’t get together with friends and every day starts to seem the same as every other day.

Bob and I have been watching documentaries about train trips around the world. On every one we hear how incredibly skilled the engineers are. But I’m a little skeptical: after all, they can only go forward and backward. It’s not like they’re helicopter pilots flying in three dimensions: up & down, left & right, forward & backward, not to mention angles. (I used to work for a company that made heads-up displays for pilots. I had a bug in my software that only happened when you were flying down and to the left. So to test things, I’d have to get in the simulator and practically crash the damn thing.)

I love the percussion in the intro.

Ahren Buchheister: Piano, Upright Bass, Vocals
Nick Bertling: Drums
Noah Bein: Organ

lyrics

You Must Be An Idiot (2020) : I wrote a song about the love of my life called, “You’re Perfect.” In a way this song is a complement to that one. This song is about me being imperfect. Although it’s not literally about me. This guy is just smart enough to realize he doesn’t deserve his perfect mate. And, weirdly, he’s just good enough to tell her so.

This song contains one of my all-time favorite rhymes: “pretty but,” and “idiot.”

Ahren Buchheister: Electric Guitar, Electric Bass
Nick Bertling: Drums
Seth Kibel: Tenor Sax

lyrics

My Home Town (2020) : When you grow up in a town, and leave as an adult, it’s very strange to visit. You see everything simultaneously through your little kid’s eyes and your grown-up eyes.

For example, the church I grew up attending seemed absolutely vast. I thought it was the biggest in the world, with the possible exception of Saint Peter’s in Rome. When I visit it now, it still seems vast—but at the same time medium-sized.

If you only visit occasionally, changes are magnified. My hometown, Joliet, Illinois, was in serious decline for years. It was then suddenly revived when riverboat gambling came and pumped in tons of money.

All of us kids believed that Joliet used to be Juliet, to go with the nearby town of Romeoville. Supposedly Lincoln visited and suggested they change the name to Joliet, after the French explorer. The story might not be true but I’d rather believe it than find out.

Ahren Buchheister: Piano, Wurlitzer, Bass Guitar, Electric Guitar
Noah Bein: Organ
Nick Bertling: Drums
Jerry Hughes: Additional Arrangement

lyrics

What Came Between Us (2020) : I was thinking about what kinds of materials can come between two lovers: cotton, denim. And then I started thinking about what other kinds of things can come between people: for example physical distance and disagreements over things like politics and religion. I do worry about using clichés like mothers-in-law, but sometimes it’s fun to enshrine clichés in song.

Ahren Buchheister: Upright Bass, Classical Guitar, Acoustic Guitar
Noah Bein: Organ
Seth Kibel: Flute, Clarinet
Frank Russo: Drums

lyrics

Life’s A Cruise (2020) : My family took a cruise around southeast Alaska. I’m a skyscraper and art museum kind of guy, but like everyone else who goes to Alaska I was blown away by the natural beauty.

I’m not a people person, but a cruise gives plenty of opportunities for people- watching. And during this cruise I got the brilliant idea—that no one’s ever had before—that life itself is like a cruise.

Ahren Buchheister: Mandolin, Banjo, Piano, Accordion, Upright Bass
Seth Kibel: Flute
Nick Bertling: Drums
Noah Bein: Organ

lyrics

Regular Guy (2020) : Straight white American males. Regular guys. Guys who are at ease in their own skin. Who expect to be in charge. Who expect to be waited on. I’ve been around them all my life. I envy them. I sort of admire them. I kind of hate them.

Were they born that way? Should I try to be like them? I’m not like them. What’s wrong with me?

Ahren Buchheister: Electric Guitar, Bass Guitar, Synth
Nick Bertling: Drums

lyrics

In My Bubble (2020) : I was born into The Midwest middle class. I was the first person in my family to go to college. When I went to grad school, my parents had no idea what that was. But I really took to academia; it seemed like my natural home. I’m a real scholar! At the same time, I’m still that Midwest kid who actually watches TV.

Since I married a college professor, I’ve spent a lot of time at faculty parties and just hobnobbing with intellectuals. The kind who work the following sentence into every conversation: “I don’t even own a TV.” We talk about the books we’ve read and opera singers we loathe.

Fox News viewers aren’t the only people living in a bubble—we have our own bubble. And I felt like teasing us.

Ahren Buchheister: Electric Guitar, Bass Guitar
Nick Bertling: Drums

lyrics

Smile (2020) : I’m jealous of our cat. I swear my husband loves our cat more than he loves me. He certainly gives the cat bigger smiles.

But that’s too stupid to write a song about, so I changed the cat to a human.

Musically the cool thing in this song is that the full statement of the melody doesn’t occur until the very end. For the lyrics that’s a challenge because all the incomplete statements of the melody include a rhyme even though they’re missing the last line. So the end requires a triple rhyme. But I managed to do a quadruple. That sort of thing can sound ridiculous and fake but I think here it seems natural.

Ahren Buchheister: Piano, Upright Bass
Josh Lilly: Piano
Noah Bein: Organ

lyrics

There Was A Time (2020) : This is one of my ain’t-I-pathetic songs. Normally at this point I would say it isn’t about me, Lee Chapman, it’s about a character who just happens to have a few things in common with me. But in this song, this character falls in love with a hurdy-gurdy player—I think it might really be about me.

Ahren Buchheister: Electric Guitar, Upright Bass, Pedal Steel, Classical Guitar, Violin, Accordion
Robert Green: Hurdy-Gurdy

lyrics

I Can’t Believe (2020) : I’m big on giving proper credit to people. I was recording an old song of mine and saw that I had typed on it “Thanks Dave.” This is my old college buddy Dr. Dave Lipkin, who used to make suggestions for songs in progress. I couldn’t remember exactly what he had contributed to the song, so I called him. Not only did he not remember what he contributed, he didn’t even remember the song.

During our chat he mentioned his favorite song of mine from back then, “I Can’t Believe.” I couldn’t remember it so he actually sang it to me over the phone! It all came back and I decided to record a 2021 version. I dug it out of my files. All I had was a typed lyric sheet with some chords written in. But I remembered the melody. The problem was that some of the lyrics were just embarrassing: even referring to masturbation and ejaculation. So I replaced the embarrassing lyrics, added a chorus, and made lots of little improvements. I added some nice lyrics about the love of my life, my husband Bob. This is good because Bob thinks I’m always dishing him in my songs, and sometimes I am. And sometimes he deserves it. Anyway, now I think it’s a pretty good song.

Ahren Buchheister: Electric Guitar, Electric Bass
Nick Bertling: Drums
Lee Chapman: Acoustic Guitar

lyrics

Ornaments (2020) : The worst thing about Christmas is assembling the tree and untangling the lights. The best thing, of course, is getting gifts. The second best thing is hanging our ornaments.

We have one from every trip we’ve taken. We have some from our parents and grandparents. We have some that are just ours. I have some I made as a kid and some my dad made.

The most precious thing is one of the ornament hooks my dad made during World War II from coat hangers.

Ahren Buchheister: Upright Bass, Sleigh Bells
Noah Bein: Organ
Josh Lilly: Piano
Lee Chapman: Acoustic Guitar, 12-String Acoustic Guitar
Frank Russo: Drums

lyrics

Someone Else (2020) : From the title one might think this is one of my I’m-a-jerk songs, but it’s not! It’s a you’re-a-jerk song. Probably my only you’re-a-jerk song.

Ahren Buchheister: Piano, Upright Bass, Additional Percussion
Mike Noonan: Trombone
Nick Bertling: Drums
Noah Bein: Organ

lyrics

Just A Fad (2020) :When I was In grad school I had a great idea for a song. The 60s were over; the idea that love was all you need was fading fast. It was starting to seem that love was just a fad. Great idea for a song! “Just a Fad”!

I wrote the song and sang it for my voice teacher. But he didn’t hear “just a fad,” he heard “justified” and therefore the lyrics made no sense. Everybody I sang it for heard “justified,” no matter how hard I try to enunciate. I couldn’t figure out how to save the song and so I abandoned it.

50 years later I was still feeling bad about this, so I wrote a new version, “Just—a—Fad.”

Ahren Buchheister: Acoustic Guitar, 12-string Guitar, Electric Bass
Seth Kibel: Flute
Noah Bein: Organ

lyrics

Probabilities (2020) : Some people didn’t take Math 320, Theory of Probability. Some of them think things are black-and-white: masks aren’t perfect so they’re pointless; washing hands doesn’t kill every germ so why bother? They think the only probabilities are 0% and 100%.

So this song is a crash course on probability. Just kidding. It’s really about what to think when someone you love believes something crazy.

This is not a real song. But if the Beatles can put out something like “Why Don’t We Do It In the Road,” which is hardly a real song either, I can put this out.

I was taking piano lessons and learned the 6-9 chord. To fix the concept in my brain I decided to write a song with only 6-9 chords. This is it.

The words came from a nothing little poem I’d written recently about my fear of bugs. I’ve been trying to songs with fewer words. So, as an exercise, in this one I spread out the words. I like it a lot, but it’s not a real song.

Ahren Buchheister: Electric Guitar, Electric Bass, Piano, Claps, Tambourine
Nick Bertling: Drums

lyrics

Life is Unreal (2020) : Our psychedelic homage to The Beatles.

Lee Chapman, Ahren Buchheister, Rachel Woodward: vocals

lyrics

Light Switch (2020) : This is not a real song. But if the Beatles can put out something like “Why Don’t We Do It In the Road,” which is hardly a real song either, I can put this out.

I was taking piano lessons and learned the 6-9 chord. To fix the concept in my brain I decided to write a song with only 6-9 chords. This is it.

The words came from a nothing little poem I’d written recently about my fear of bugs. I’ve been trying to songs with fewer words. So, as an exercise, in this one I spread out the words. I like it a lot, but it’s not a real song.

lyrics